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Posted on March 15, 2015 3:36 pm
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ByHuSu
ByHuSu
Reps: 102
Assistant Principal Parent
I have one student who has no motivation whatsoever. He is EBD and OBD, but his parents refuse to have him served. He does not care about his work, gets extremely angry when I try to help him, and just shrugs his shoulders when I show him what all these 0s are doing for his grade.
His father is an assistant principal in our county and constantly tries to belittle me. His son's grades are ALWAYS my fault. I need to break up the assignments for him. I need to make a checklist for him. I need to write down his assignments in his planner for him. I need to let him retake the test as many times as it takes. I need to give him new copies of the assignments and not penalize him for turning them in weeks late.
I give in to a lot of these because it is not worth the fight with the parent. The student is still not doing anything, though, even with all of these exceptions. It has even gotten to the point where the dad has asked me to start packing his bookbag for him.

The child is very smart. He is eight weeks away from finishing fourth grade. There is no reason I should be having to do all of this stuff for him, and it makes it extremely difficult because when I make these exceptions, they have to be done for the other students as well.

I have stopped giving in to a lot of them because I think it is ridiculous that this child is not willing to take any responsibility. I am bending over backwards, and he could not care less. It does not change anything... he still has not completed more than five assignments fully the entire year, which is in turn reflecting on his test scores.

Dad is livid, but I have had enough. He is constantly going to the administration about me and threatning to take it to the board, even though I have met all his demands and have spent more than my fair share of time with his child. It is not fair to me or the other students. I have tried everything with this child, including all the incentives the two of us could think of together.

Any suggestions?
 
     
     
 
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Solution 1
Posted March 15, 2015 4:36 pm

Hytabu
Hytabu
Reps: 103
Have you tried talking to your principal? Or even the superintendent? Be sure you are documenting EVERYTHING. That is the biggest thing. If you have documentation of the things you have done to help this students, and the parent tries to say you haven't, then you have proof. That is in extremely hard situation you have been put in. The best advice I have is to document, document, document. Be sure that you are putting everything in writing. If you send notes home, copy them. If you have conversations, I would type an e-mail up and e-mail it to the parent and your administration and just say, here are the points we discussed. I know it seems like a lot, but documentation will save you. I had a EBD student in my class at the beginning of the year and I had to document everything in order for my SPED teacher to "believe" the things he was doing.
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ymuXyg
ymuXyg
Reps: 100
Yes, documenting everything is key in this scenario. Great advice.
  Posted on: October 18, 2015 6:06 pm

Kady Schlemmer
Kady Schlemmer
Reps: 202
This is a very thorough solution. It is very helpful.
  Posted on: July 9, 2016 8:53 pm

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Solution 2
Posted October 15, 2015 1:49 am

uTaMaW
uTaMaW
Reps: 78
In this situation, I believe the only course of action that might resolve the problem will be between you and your own administration. The father is an assistant principle which means that he understands the ropes very well. He is telling you to provide special education level modification for his child but is refusing to have the child tested or placed in the correct setting in order to receive the maximum level of support that is needed to insure academic success. Get all of your ducks in a row and present your experience to your principal and see what happens. Chances are, you are not the first teacher that has struggled with this dynamic. I recognize that this will be very challenging for you but proceeding in good conscious is your best option.
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Solution 3
Posted October 4, 2015 5:48 pm

eDuMez
eDuMez
Reps: 100
I'm sorry this is happening. I agree with documenting everything. I would also try to give the student a job like pass out all of the planners etc. Maybe involving him in the activities and making him feel important will help change his mood. Otherwise, I would call a meeting with the parent and the principal. Good luck
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Solution 4
Posted October 14, 2015 1:25 am

zaRaQy
zaRaQy
Reps: 77
As stated, documentation is vital in this situation. Also the student needs a self-monitoring behavior plan that is signed by the parents. The undesired behaviors need to be addressed on this behavior sheet. This will provide documentation, but also help the dad become aware of the students lack of motivation in the classroom. Another option is for the dad to come to the classroom to observe his child. This will provide an opportunity to see if you all can come up with a plan that will be beneficial at school and at home.
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