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Posted on March 11, 2015 11:54 am
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yQaran
yQaran
Reps: 100
Am I a Boy or Girl?
We have student who is a girl. She dresses out in the girls locker and by every document she is classified as a female. Recently, she dropped the "f" bomb in class and I spoke with her about this behavior and how it is unacceptable and offensive. I told her that it sounds so trashy coming from a young lady's mouth. Her response to me was, "I am not a girl." A few days later, she turned in an excuse and where her mother had written "her" or "she", she crossed out and put "him" or "he". What are some suggestions on how to handle this? Because it is clear that her parents are unaware of this situation.
 
     
     
 
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Solution 1
Posted March 15, 2015 1:20 am

eXeNum
eXeNum
Reps: 103
I would speak to the school counselor about it. They will have more experience and training in dealing with sexuality and gender issues. However, it would be beneficial during any future behavior incidents to avoid gender biases. Such appropriate behavior is wrong for any student, regardless of gender.
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neHaGy
neHaGy
Reps: 200
This is an great solution! i will definitely use this in my classroom.
  Posted on: October 2, 2015 6:24 pm

Kady Schlemmer
Kady Schlemmer
Reps: 202
Wow, this is a difficult situation to be in. I agree, seeking help from a counselor would be the best choice. They will be better trained to help the student.
  Posted on: July 9, 2016 8:29 pm

Kathy Allen
Kathy Allen
Reps: 100
Talking to other people in the school such as the counselor can help the student better.
  Posted on: February 23, 2018 7:44 pm

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Solution 2
Posted March 15, 2015 7:53 pm

yTenyV
yTenyV
Reps: 104
The counselor has been trained to address cases like this and would be the best person to go through. I would definitely contact the counselor and have a team meeting as well. Just let the student know that you are supportive and willing to listen and help.
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Solution 3
Posted March 12, 2015 1:46 pm

Jordan Najafi
Jordan Najafi
Reps: 102
This is a very delicate situation to approach. Unless one is well versed in LGBTQ matters and terms, I would make a counselor and the parents aware of the situation. I would also look into the program "Safe Space." Students who face these issues are often very sensitive to any action that could be misconstrued as an attempt to make them feel one way or another.
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Solution 4
Posted March 11, 2015 3:21 pm

usyvaS
usyvaS
Reps: 100
As a teacher, I would not address this with the student unless I have a rapport with the student. Even at the establishment of a teacher-student relationship, I would include the counselor at the school. It would not be something I would personally call the parents and disclose due to the sensitive nature of the issue. Before meeting with the student, I would let the counselor know the situation and ask if you could be included in the meeting because of course you are concerned as to what is going on and why this young lady is behaving as such.
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neHaGy
neHaGy
Reps: 200
This is an great solution! i will definitely use this in my classroom.
  Posted on: October 2, 2015 6:25 pm

meXyHy
meXyHy
Reps: 158
If I were in this situation, I would exactly do this.
  Posted on: October 15, 2015 9:36 pm

eSyTyt
eSyTyt
Reps: 101
I would also use this solution in my classroom.
  Posted on: October 16, 2015 2:31 am

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Solution 5
Posted February 29, 2016 2:08 am

Rachel Antis
Rachel Antis
Reps: 205
I believe that the first problem is that the teacher responded by saying that cursing sounds trashy "coming from a young lady's mouth"; when, instead, they should have not specified gender and said that it is simply not appropriate. Saying that it is inappropriate for a young lady encourages the idea that young ladies do not behave a certain way and should adhere to a specific gender role. Now, it should be considered that this student is going through a time of change as well as finding themselves. Therefore they may be determining whether or not they identify with being a girl or a boy. I think that it is important that they are able to figure this out in a safe environment, so it may be best to refer them to a student counselor. It would also probably be best to allow the student to address this with their parents as they see fit, as this may be a sensitive issue that their parents do not agree with or accept.
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Solution 6
Posted October 11, 2015 7:28 pm

dubaNu
dubaNu
Reps: 190
I would speak to a professional such as the school counselor to get advice on your next step. Going strait to the parents of the child may not be the best solution.
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Solution 7
Posted March 11, 2015 5:04 pm

Kayla Conoly
Kayla Conoly
Reps: 129
This situation would be something for the counselor to help with. I would contact the counselor and relate the story. I would then follow up with the counselor to discover the outcome or what you need to do as an educator. Contacting parents could create an uproar the student does not want.
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Solution 8
Posted September 28, 2015 11:13 pm

eduruM
eduruM
Reps: 100
Talking to a counselor to help the student may be the best option, especially if you are unaware of the LGBTQ terms and meanings. This may be a sensitive issue for her and her family so I think it is important to be delicate with the situation. You would not want to end up offending someone.
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Solution 9
Posted October 18, 2015 8:00 pm

Qanuna
Qanuna
Reps: 130
First, I think you should be careful with how you deal with this situation. Saying something like "it sounds so trashy" probably should not have been said. The parents may use that language at home and be perfectly find with it. The student using the "F" bomb should have been addressed with simply, that language is not tolerated in my classroom. In regards to the student and gender that should be taken up with a counselor or a conference involving the teacher, parents and counselor.
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Solution 10
Posted February 21, 2017 6:56 pm

ytupyQ
ytupyQ
Reps: 208
Speaking to the counselor will be your best option for advice and help. Also if it was my class and student I would do a bunch of research. Look up blogs, youtube videos and articles. There are tons of advice for this.
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Solution 11
Posted October 8, 2017 11:29 pm

eBenyL
eBenyL
Reps: 101
Talk to the student about the letter and why they said they are not a girl and why they crossed out "her" on the paper
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Solution 12
Posted October 9, 2017 1:16 am

Travis Cannon
Travis Cannon
Reps: 211
i would ask the guidance counselor first but, i would also call the parent and ask them if they refer to the student as a boy or a girl.
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Solution 13
Posted July 2, 2018 3:25 pm

Markelle Maddock
Markelle Maddock
Reps: 100
Guidance counselors are trained in this area. I would refer the student to the counselor to talk and let the counselor know what is happening.
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Solution 14
Posted July 2, 2018 3:27 pm

Markelle Maddock
Markelle Maddock
Reps: 100
Guidance counselors are trained in this area. I would speak to the guidance counselor about what is happening with the student and let them take over. Still make notes on the child's behavior because if this is how they feel, signs of depression could become evident.
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Solution 15
Posted October 16, 2016 9:27 pm

ytupyQ
ytupyQ
Reps: 208
I would start by having a talk with the student. After how that goes then talk to the parents and explain to them what is going on. She may be gender fluid and thats okay. Some people do not feel they are the gender that they are labeled as.
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Solution 16
Posted October 2, 2015 11:21 pm

reHuSe
reHuSe
Reps: 100
I would make no assuptions about the student and bring the issue to a counselors attention and let them decide on the next course of action.
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Solution 17
Posted March 12, 2015 12:03 am

aNuLyB
aNuLyB
Reps: 103
I would definitely let the guidance counselor deal with this situation.
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uzyXuV
uzyXuV
Reps: 208
I would go right to guidance counselor with this.
  Posted on: October 15, 2015 4:08 pm

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Solution 18
Posted October 4, 2015 2:40 am

uZyvaP
uZyvaP
Reps: 204
I would make the parents aware of the situation and then refer the student to the guidance counselor for further assistance.
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uzyXuV
uzyXuV
Reps: 208
I would let the counselor contact the parents. They having training for situations like this and I wouldn't want to offend the parents.
  Posted on: October 15, 2015 4:10 pm

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